The worst part about over-dramatized shock comedy is that now most of my friends will bring things up out of context and make them sound entirely worse then they are in-context.
Me- “Sometimes I think about how people usually joke about how Women have to sit down and take a minute to pee and Men just stand up and go in less then a few seconds. But after one awkward poo on an Amtrack train I realized: at least Women don’t have anything that can flop down onto the rim of a toilet…”
Them - “Hey Michael remember that time you were talking about the Ball sack on the Amtrack train?” And then I die a little inside.
To the cute, pale, redheaded girl who I bonded over Fallout 3 with on the first day of your second semester, 2014:
I will be eternally depressed that I couldn’t find the Steam ID you gave me, and that given our majors and the size of our school, I’ll probably never see you again.